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A Matter of Honor
by Amy McWilliams (McAmy)
Book 2: Honor Bound
Chapter 6: Year Two at Mywoods
"So basically you spent the
last two weeks of your three-week summer break holed up in a dungeon?" Greg
teased. Having visited her parents before going to Hogwarts ("It did not
go well" was the only description she would give), Hermione had agreed to
extend her visit at Minerva's request--and not in small part because she and Professor
Snape had fallen into old working patterns again.
Hermione rolled her eyes. "Yes,
Greg, and we got excellent work done. I think I've solved that bit with the Hippogriff
hoof now." She saw him smile, expecting her to launch into yet another description
of her work, and said instead, "And besides, I could think of worse things
to do than work for two weeks with Severus Snape on a promising project."
Greg lifted an eyebrow, watching
her as she took a bite out of her sandwich. "Oh, indeed," he said, knowingly.

Having taken the remaining required
sections over the summer--Astronomy and Care of Magical Creatures (luckily, the
requirements allowed students to skip one subject completely, and she hadn't had
to take Divination)--Hermione was facing a school year filled with classes from
her major. She had taken an Advanced Charms course as an elective, as well as
the second-year classes in Potions, Arithmancy, and Herbology. She then had an
Advanced Seminar on the history of Arithmancy, as well as one on Herbal Potions.
The spring term would be more of the same, except for the Charms.
In early October, she received word
that her application for grant money from the Ministry for her work on the Cruciatus
Curse had been approved. Two weeks later, Ars Alchemica had written to
say that they would like to see a new draft of her article, reflecting her more
recent work on the subject. Apparently the grant had worked in her favor there,
as well.
Since her visit to Hogwarts, she
had written to Snape more frequently. While he rarely wrote to her of anything
other than work, the letters felt more open, somehow, and Hermione found herself
including bits from her classes and asking him about the others at Hogwarts, or
how his classes were going. He assured her that nothing had changed, and that
the in-class explosion tally was already up to nineteen.
Neither of them wrote anything about
Voldemort.
Hermione had told Greg about falling
apart in Snape's office. She had thought that he would tell her that she was mad,
but he had said, "It makes sense, Hermione. This is the man you credit with
near omniscience, after all. He makes you feel safe. And he couldn't do anything
about this. The thought of him not being safe may be worse to you than knowing
Harry and Ron are in danger. It's not the way things are supposed to be. And at
the same time you're realizing he's vulnerable, just the same as you are, he's
acting like nothing's happened. You felt shut out
you felt that you needed
him to understand. You probably didn't realize how much until you saw him."
He was right. Just as she had needed
Snape to see that she was talented, that her ideas were good, she had needed him
to understand her pain. Because from what little she knew about how much he suffered,
she expected him to have the answers to that, too.
"Omniscience indeed," she
said to Crookshanks. "The man's brilliant, but he's only human." Crookshanks
meowed in agreement, and she realized that the thought wasn't so scary after all.

"Besides, I think you like
him," Greg said, as they continued their conversation about Snape one day
in November. He had sent Hermione his suggestions on her article revision, and
she had told Greg that she was a little irked that it meant so much to her that
he liked her work.
She shot him a look. "I do not,"
she insisted, but had to look away as she said it.
He smiled broadly. "I've finally
sussed it out, haven't I
you have a thing for Snape!"
She closed her eyes and wrinkled
her nose, taking in a deep breath. She let it out and looked at him, her face
still scrunched up. "I might
" she admitted.
Greg started laughing. "Gods,
why didn't I see it before? This explains a lot."
Hermione shook her head. "Greg,
please don't make a big deal out of this. It's not
it's not like I want to
marry the man--and I'm sure he doesn't think anything of the sort about me. I
just
think he's interesting."
"And attractive," said
Greg, matter-of-factly. "You want to snog the teacher. Admit it."
Hermione looked away, refusing to
answer.

In late November, eleven months after
the London raid, Voldemort struck again. This time, he bypassed London--where
the Ministry had been focusing their attentions, Greg noted grimly--and hit smaller
targets around the country: Hogwarts, and the Auror training facilities in Dublin
and Glasgow.
Hogwarts seemed to have been merely
an afterthought. There was no damage to the school itself, though Hogsmeade had
been hard hit. The main purpose of this round had been to knock out the Auror
support system, leaving London isolated. In the wake of the attacks, Voldemort's
supporters had begun to terrorize those who did not support the Dark Lord, focusing,
for the moment, on major cities.
Harry and Ron were safe, at least
for the moment, and Hermione had not recognized any of the names on the lists
of the dead, missing, and wounded. She had not, however, heard from anyone at
Hogwarts, so when a large barn owl arrived at Greg and Bill's window, she opened
it before they even realized the bird was there.
She ripped open the note as Bill
fetched the bird some water. Greg asked, "What is it?" fearing the worst
from the intent look on her face.
As she skimmed the page, her jaw
clenched, and then relaxed. She closed her eyes for a moment and sighed. "It's
from Remus. He's writing to say that everyone is safe at Hogwarts. Nobody was
hurt."
"That's a relief," said
Greg.
Bill nodded. "I'm just worried
that they're going to get it into their head to hit Mywoods one of these days."
Hermione shook her head. "I
don't think so. I don't think they'll want to spread themselves that wide--not
right now, at least. They hit Hogwarts because Dumbledore is there."
"And they hit Glasgow again
because Harry is there?" Greg asked gently. Hermione nodded.

The next morning, Hermione woke to
the sound of owl wings. She was instantly alert, and at the sight of Mordred outside
her window, a bolt of relief shot through her stomach. Remus had told her that
everybody was safe, but she knew that Snape wouldn't necessarily let anybody know
everything that had happened to him--if he had been in contact with the Death
Eaters that night.
She opened the window and the bird
came to rest on the edge of her desk. She took the envelope from his leg and he
gave her a look before lifting off again. She was too intent on the note to scold
him for his bad manners.
Dear Miss Granger,
Though I suspect that one of your
other correspondents will have written to let you know that Hogwarts has made
it through this latest attack unscathed, I wanted to write myself to assure you
that all was well. I know that you worry.
Sincerely,
Prof. Severus Snape
From anybody else, the letter would
have seemed cold. Any other reader would have wondered why Snape bothered to write
at all. But Hermione smiled, and read the letter again before putting it safely
into her desk drawer with the others.

"Back so soon, my pet?"
Snape said with a smirk as Mordred sailed into the classroom and came to rest
on his shoulder. "I'm sure Miss Granger will have something to say about
that." The owl hooted. "Off with you then, I've work to do." Mordred
nipped at his master's ear before floating into the office, headed for the hidden
corridor to Snape's private chambers. The owl chose to stay there instead of in
the owlery. It was one of the many things Snape liked about his feathered familiar.
He had not been called before these
latest attacks, and that left him more anxious than he had been though all the
months of waiting. There was a good chance that Voldemort no longer trusted him.
That could mean that he was no longer useful
.
Faced with the knowledge that his
days might finally be numbered, he had been surprised to find that one of his
first thoughts--once he was safely back in his dungeons the night of the attack
and had a chance to think--was how glad he was that Mywoods had not been targeted.
His second thought had been that
he should write to her, to let her know that he was all right. He had known that
she
liked him (he still hesitated on the word), that she enjoyed working
with him and wanted to continue their work in the future. That she respected his
opinion, valued his guidance. What he had not known, until she was there, screaming
at him in his office, sobbing out her fears in his classroom--what he had not
known until he had held her to him, whispering the words of comfort he had heard
other professors use, having none of his own--was how passionate she was. Not
about her work, not this time. The sheer depth of her emotion floored him. And
part of it, he had realized, was for him.
He had dealt with her automatically
(he couldn't credit himself with having the instinct), trying to speak calmly
at first, to keep her from leaving--to keep her from hating him. Supporting her
as she collapsed, though he feared she must feel the awkwardness in the movement,
the inclination to draw back to a safe distance. Saying the words he thought she
would want to hear, though he could not believe them himself. He couldn't remember
how they'd gotten back to his office.
He was glad she had stayed that afternoon.
He was also glad that she had changed the subject so readily, and that, over the
remainder of her stay, they had gone back to work. That was familiar; that was
a connection he understood.
As for the rest
The realization
that there was something else--something he couldn't articulate, didn't want to
examine too closely--had shocked him. He shoved it aside. There was no room for
anything else. Not now.

People prepared for Christmas cautiously.
Decorations were sparse, and no one felt like shopping for gifts or singing carols.
Bill, however, was playing David Bowie's "Peace on Earth" duet with
Bing Crosby repeatedly, as if holding on to it for dear life. "At least he
has the sense to use headphones, most of the time," said Greg, trying to
make light of things.
It was as though the wizarding community
was waiting for the other shoe to drop. Hermione knew that Remus thought the continuing
terrorism against "mudbloods" was a sign that Voldemort was not going
to hibernate for another year this time. And Minerva's invitation to spend Christmas
at Hogwarts did nothing to alleviate her fears. She suspected that both of her
professors knew more than they were telling. On top of everything else, Snape
had been oddly quiet. Remus hadn't said much about the attempted raid at Hogwarts--nobody
had--but from the way he spoke about Snape, it was clear that there was reason
for her to be worried.
On Christmas Eve, Voldemort struck
again.
On Christmas Day, he was defeated.
The strike against the Ministry headquarters
in London began just before midnight. As the battle waged throughout the night,
a smaller force had attempted to infiltrate the Auror training facility in Glasgow.
Voldemort had been with the latter
group; the attack in London had been a diversion. Voldemort wanted Harry dead,
once and for all--as a symbol, if nothing else. But the boy who lived still lived,
and the Dark Lord was no more.
Hermione had Apparated to Glasgow
the moment she'd heard the news. No one seemed to know if Harry was injured, or
dying--no one could tell her exactly what had happened. She had thought about
going to Hogwarts instead (her thoughts had flickered to Snape), but she knew
that she had to see for herself that Harry was safe.
The guards hadn't wanted to let her
in, but Remus was there, and had brought her through the barricades, brought her
to Harry's room where he lay sleeping, pale and weak, the scar on his forehead
a vicious shade of crimson.
Sirius was there as well, and he
crossed to her, Remus taking the chair he vacated at Harry's side.
"He'll be all right," Sirius
said, putting his arm around her.
She nodded, her eyes dry. "What
happened?" she finally managed.
"We
we don't know
"
Sirius answered. "Nobody is sure."
"Hermione?" a voice came
from the doorway. She turned to see Ron, a gash on his forearm oozing with blood,
a scrape on his cheek, his robes singed.
She ran to him, fell into his arms,
and, crying now, said, "He's going to be all right. He's going to be all
right."
On
to Chapter 7
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